WAISTBAND
Must remain within shouting distance of the armpits.
SWAMP REGIONAL OFFICE // INTERNAL USE ONLY
THE SWAMP HAS A MANAGER NOW.
Nobody hired him. The pants were enough.
Croc found one pair of pleated slacks behind a strip mall. Four minutes later he scheduled your performance review.
BUY / TRADE — PENDINGX / TWITTER — PENDINGTELEGRAM — PENDING
MANAGEMENT
REGIONAL PANTS MANAGERActing Senior Vice President of Standing Near The Pond
MEET YOUR MANAGER
HIS QUALIFICATIONS
ARE PANTS.
Experience: none.
Employees: none.
Confidence: catastrophic.
He does not know what the company does. He only knows you are behind schedule.
MANDATORY POLICY UPDATE
THE PANTS POLICY
CREASE
Sharp enough to lower morale on contact.
TAIL ACCOMMODATION
Request denied. Please stop asking.
CASUAL FRIDAY
Suspended due to an incident.
CURRENT PRIORITIES
- Schedule the meeting.
- Reschedule the meeting.
- Hold a smaller meeting about the first meeting.
- Blame the pond.
- Eat one loose grape over the sink after work.
PERFORMANCE REVIEW
- EMPLOYEE
- YOU
- ATTENDANCE
- SUSPICIOUS
- PANTS
- INSUFFICIENT
- OVERALL RATING
- LET'S CIRCLE BACK
“I expected less, and somehow this still happened.”NEEDS MEETING
MANDATORY ATTENDANCE
CLOCK IN, COWARD.
The meeting started six minutes ago. Nobody knows why.
BUY / TRADE — PENDINGX / TWITTER — PENDINGTELEGRAM — PENDING